Saturday, January 21, 2012

How bad do you want it?

Once there was a woman who wanted to be successful.
So she went to this guru right?
and she tells the guru, "look your really accomplished, I want to be on your level right."
Then she asks, "So whats your secret, what do I have to do to be on your level?"
He laughs at her and tells her, "If you want to be as successful me, meat me at the beach tomorrow morning."
So she get's up early the next morning, and goes to the beach...
Wearing a dress, she shoulda worn a swim suit.
The guru say's, "walk out in the water."
She's up to here knee's now.
He tells her to go out a little further.
She's thinking, this guy is crazy.
Up to her shoulders now.
He say's go a little further.
She walks out a bit further, it's up to her mouth now.
She's thinking I didn't come here to go swimming, I want to make money this guys got me wading in the ocean.
And she's like, "fuck this, I give up."
He's standing next to her and he stops her and asks...
"Wait a minute, I thought you wanted to be successful?"
She's like, "yeah."
So he takes her, shoves her head under water, she doesn't scratch him, doesn't hit him. He let's her up right before she's about to pass out.
And she's like, "What the fucks you problem man?"
So he explains...
Your never gonna be successful until you want it as bad as you want to breath.
You every had an asthma attack?
You don't care about nothing except getting that fresh air in your lungs.
Thats how bad you gotta want it.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Wicked Games

"You will not stop. The pain is necessary, especially the pain of hunger. It reassures you that you are strong, can withstand anything, that you are not a slave to your body, you don’t have to give in to its whining." -Marya Hornbacher's Wasted
Why? You want to know why? Step into a tanning booth and fry yourself for two or three days. After your skin bubbles and peels off, roll in coarse salt, then pull on long underwear woven from spun glass and razor wire. Over that goes your regular clothes, as long as they are tight. Smoke gunpowder and go to school to jump through hoops, sit up and beg, and roll over on command. Listen to the whispers that curl into your head at night, calling you ugly and fat and stupid and bitch and whore and worst of all, “a disappointment.” Puke and starve and cut and drink because you don’t want to feel any of this. Puke and starve and drink and cut because you need the anesthetic and it works. For a while. But then the anesthetic turns into poison and by then it’s too late because you are mainlining it now, straight into your soul. It is rotting you and you can’t stop. Look in a mirror and find a ghost. Hear every heartbeat scream that everysinglething is wrong with you.“Why?” is the wrong question. Ask “Why not?”
-from Laurie Halse Anderson’s Wintergirls